home by the sea

This is one of those things in life I didn't want to think of much the less write about. Aging parents. Both of mine are in their seventies now, and seem to be approaching that point in life where they might need some extra help in doing what used to come easy to them. They're (thankfully) still fully capable of caring for themselves and only need the kind of help that my bi-anual trips seem to satisfy. They always have a honey do list waiting for me when I arrive, but the list has been growing slightly longer with each visit. I managed to get everything done on this trip but spent each day taking care of something else that wasn't on the list. I have a feeling that the list will be longer than the time I have time for on my next visit.

Something happened that really broke my heart. It happened more than once, and I first caught it out of the corner of my eye while we were out shopping. It was ever so slight, but it nonetheless happened. My mommy ... has the old people shakes. Right now it's just her head, and seems to happen only when she's sitting. Mom is a little too proud to admit this kind of stuff is happening to her; I know she'll deny it so there was no point in bringing it up. This was confirmed recently by my sister who told me that both she and my father have already met with resistance when they tried. Other than this everything else is in perfect workling order.

My father is doing very well even though he only recently developed type two diabetes and gout. He's made all the proper adjustments to his life to avoid suffering from these afflictions and leads a pretty active life. Well, active in a stays at home and watches Chinese soap operas on his new HDTV kind of way.

This is a potential game changer to say the least. My sister has a family and occasionally needs help from time to time. Life led me down a different path and I'm in a place now where I have neither. I know that caring for my parents is undeniably in my future. It's now simply a matter of when which possibly makes it the proverbial monkey wrench in my plans. I'm not complaining though. They're my parents and I owe them everything. Not a single qualm will be given if I gotta drop my life to help them live out their's in a comfortable way. It does mean that this journey I've been preparing for will have to be postponed for a bit. I do take a great deal of comfort in knowing that everything I've done these last three years has not been wasted.

Regardless of outcome, the game is still afoot!


  1. When life forces changes in our plans, a lot of emotions come into play. I'm glad to see you are prepared by your love of family to make those changes. It will still be hard emotionaly to put your life on hold when the time comes. Some of us are destined to do whats right for others first.

    1. Thank you D! Actually, if it comes to pass, I'm really ok with it. I thought about it some more and this is a win/win because it means I get to be a daily part of my nephew's life. As opposed to the crazy but fun visiting uncle.