a break

As much as anyone loves doing anything in life, you have to take a break. I hadn't. At least not since January. I was so involved in learning how to deal with some of the kids in my area that I'd forgotten to make some time for myself. I tried at any rate. I was supposed to have last Tuesday off, but instead it was yesterday. Tuesday was also my birthday which almost quietly passed unnoticed. I say almost because someone at work found out and I received a Dogtown round of radio birthday wishes in the afternoon. Not that I have a thing against birthday wishes. I do like them. I prefer having the day off to avoid some of the fuss that people make. I think I feel almost like I don't deserve it. Hmmmm. I'll have to explore that one later on. So I was turning 49 and really wasn't sure how I felt about it. I mean was it something I should accept gracefully or freak out about. Or was I supposed to buy a sports car or something? Now that I've had some time to decompress and process it, I came to the conclusion that I feel nothing about it. I don't care. Why? Not really sure but I think it might have to do with all the recent life changes I've made. At any rate. I'm here! I'm old'ish! Get used to it!

One other thing worth mentioning about the bday is a gift sissy got me. A six quart temperature and timer controlled crock pot. I'm excited about it! Now I can have dinner ready and waiting for me instead of having to make it when I get home. Or spend money eating out. And at six quarts I'll have a few days of leftovers to finish. My most recent pastime is digging out old recipes and scouring the net for new ones.

A quick update on Kenny. We had a potential foster lined up which fell through after they slept on it. Right before that happened a potential adopter expressed interest in him and it's been positive movement so far. This came about through a volunteer. She had spent a lot of time with him and even took him on sleepovers. She posted about her experience with him on facebook. A woman who runs a site for crippled dogs read it, contacted the volunteer, and asked if she could do a write up on Kenny for her site. The volunteer said yes. The crippled dog site woman wrote it up. The potential adopter read the story, fell in love with Kenny, and contacted the sanctuary about adopting him. The adoption is currently in progress so I'll refrain from saying any more so as to not jinx this for Kenny.


desperation and inspiration

One of the kids in my area is now under a "Quality of Life" watch. Kenny arrived about for months ago from a partner shelter that was unable to provide all the medical care he required. Kenny has spondylosis which is an incurable spinal condition. It mainly affects older dogs. He arrived with a wheelchair which was taken away immediately. The vets explained that the less he used his legs the further the condition would progress. Kenny started receiving various forms of treatment (i.e. warm laser therapy, acupuncture, hydrotherapy) as well has medicines and supplements to help him out. He was able to still walk despite being a bit wobbly on his back legs. Everything we were doing seemed to help him so far as he was not getting any worse. That was until about a few weeks ago. Kenny had three things happen at around the same time. First was his runmate getting adopted out, second was the start of hydrotherapy, and the third was being weaned off of hydrocodone to treat his lick granulomas. We're not sure if it was one or all but he started losing the mobility of his back legs and was visibly depressed. Kenny had a second QOL appointment schedule for this coming Thursday where we (the caregivers) would meet with the vet and discuss options. Unfortunately Kenny's deteriorating faster than any of us expected and his appointment was bumped up to today. I went into work today expecting to hear the worst, and unfortunately was not let down. So we're gonna put him on NSAIDS for at least a week and see if that doesn't help him before we make a decision to put him down. The vet was pretty clear that his issue isn't pain though. His only hope is this or that someone who has the time and resources to care for him around the clock adopts him before we have to decide. We can't provide around the clock care for him at the sanctuary as much as we'd love to be able to. Here's praying for a miracle and someone adopts him!

Something else that was unexpected happened at work. Well, technically it's happened a lot since I started working there. It's happened enough, and again this last week, to where I figured it might be worth a mention. In the course of my job I get to work with many volunteers. This is in the job description but not all the caregivers are good at it. I've always been a people person, in addition to being an animal person. Hence why I was identified as a good fit and was hired for this position.  In the course of my job I get to speak with and share stories with volunteers. Many have told me past an present that they find my story "inspiring" which is something of a surprise to me. I mean if I think about it I can see what they mean, but from my perspective I only changed things to make my life better. More enjoyable. Do something that I can feel good about myself at the end of the day. And by no means am I perfect or the best at what I'm doing. I've made so many mistakes since starting out. Luckily nothing that negatively impacted the lives of those in my care.

I don't know if this is true or not. I didn't come here looking for it either. A coworker here told me that heaven holds a special place for those who take it upon themselves to care for animals. This is a kind of redemption I've never felt worthy of based on how I've led my life so far. However, I didn't come here for the sole purpose of redemption so much as I felt it the right thing to do after deciding it was time to part ways with corporate America. Whatever the actual truth is, I'm humbled and awed by what I've experienced here.


it's complicated

Actually it's not. In less than a week I've managed to turn into a complete idiot around this girl. I'm avoiding explaining the details of what I'd done in order to not relive it. Now to her credit she's told me that "you're fine" which I am taking at face value despite what I'm feeling. In short I am feeling horrifically more awkward with each stupid mistake I make. I know it's been a long time since I dated and I should give myself some time. However the lapse has made me realize that I'm not at all good at dating now nor then. At this point I wonder if I've made a mistake or not. Yes I know it was just "one" date. That one date simply underscores what I'm lamenting about. 

My friend says I should give myself a few days to cool off and not think about it. I'm taking her advice and decompressing, but not before sharing it with the world first. 


the leap

So I finally made up my mind and asked someone out. I'm very happy with where I am in life but I came to the conclusion that I really miss having someone to share it with. Even if only for a short time. It's been over a decade since the last one and I was a little nervous about it. Things went well and my nervousness subsided quickly. She had a lot to do with that. I hope, moving forward, that that will be a mutual and continuing thing.

Incidentally, today is my one year anniversary here. Bridgette and I arrived late in the evening on the 11th. We're celebrating tonight since I had to work.


bake all the things

Just in case you're wondering. No, I wasn't hungover the day after my last post. It was only six beers, but on an empty stomach. I pretty much ate oatmeal the following day since I'd had nothing else handy to eat.

So it took me about two days of rearranging before I finally got around to baking something in the new oven. First up was the long craved after tater tot casserole. The following evening I made a batch of soft baked chocolate chip cookies, devoured them all, and pretty much got a stomach ache because I ate nothing else. Not smart, I know. Still, it was worth it. The following fare from hereon out will be mostly healthier. I use mostly very loosely. I'm due to get a care package from the sister which will contain a few boxes of Mochiko rice flour. With that I'll get to bake a recipe that was given to us by a childhood friend's mother. 

Nothing is ever 100% the way you need it, so a few upgrades are in order. In addition to the extra burner, oven, and microwave oven my sister is getting me a temp/timer controlled crock pot for my upcoming birthday. With one I'll avoid eating out because I'm too tired to cook when I get home from work. I also need to invest in sink covers along with making a custom cover for the stove top which will resolve my limited counter space issues. And I'll need to install a back splash since none came with. Easy enough to do and I've still got leftover double sided tape from the one I installed in the old trailer.

Damn, I'm hungry now.


in with the new

I'm thoroughly exhausted. Things, thankfully, went much smoother for me today. There were a few mishaps but nothing major. My adopted little sister (a friend/coworker here) Alyssa joined Bridgette and I for the excursion. If I hadn't spoken about her before she's one of the first people I'd met when I volunteered and was instrumental in management even considering me for the dog caregiver position I hold now. When I woke I still had some cleaning to do as well as discovering that I'd neglected to empty one of my cabinets. I scrambled and finished it all before Alyssa arrived. She was even a little late. My faithful (old) home was hitched up and off we went to St George. We arrived at the dealer and things went into warp speed. First came the old trailer unhitch, then the new rig tech walk-thru, and finally the signature fest with the finance guy.I made a quick call to my insurance agent to update things and the final cost came out to $6 above my former cost. They won't bill me for the difference since it's less than $10. At this point the finance officer started trying to sell me some additional coverage which I was pushed back on. He eventually dropped it to their cost and I was still saying no. Alyssa stepped in here and said I should take it based on how great a deal it is, but that I no longer earn what I used to. I can't absorb the cost to replace things based on my current income. The additional coverage lasts for seven years and means I only pay a $50 deductible to replace whatever fails within that time frame. I paid out of pocket to replace quite a few things on my old trailer which wasn't fun. The bottom line is that it added $9 to my monthly which is a small price to pay for peace of mind. So with the final signatures signed my salesman closed the deal by seeing me off. I am a sentimental bitch, so there was a moment with my old trailer before parting ways.

The trailer color scheme even compliments my truck.

If this recap starts getting wonky it's because I'm on my fourth beer on an empty stomach. 

Alyssa and I hit Costco and then Walmart for a shopping resupply of general stuff we needed. We got home around 3pm (mountain time). With a little help from the RV park managers the new home was fully situated in about 30 minutes and I started unpacking. I think I finally finished unpacking at around 9. This time it felt like unpacking took less time than packing. I'm not sure but I'm glad to be mostly done with it all. Since the space is different now I'll probably have to rearrange what I initially did. 

Bridgette was totally weirded out when I left her alone inside during my Walmart run. She remembered being in here from last week, but it wasn't home to her. It wasn't until we were home and I unpacked our stuff that she started to relax. I've got to say that I'm not crazy about her constant need to lay claim to my (ok, our) bed. I'm relieved to no end that we've graduated from a twin to a proper queen sized bed. I averaged at least three mid sleep roll overs onto her per month. She would wake us both with a loud yelp. This should now be a thing of the past. Right now she's completely crashed out on her side of the new dinette

I think I'm on beer #6 now and should've made dinner hours ago. Whatever. Here are a few more pictures of us moved in.


Front to back view

Back to front view

I think I'm on my sixth beer now and the laptop screen is kind of spinning. I think it's time to call it quits since I managed to get dinner cooking in the microwave finally.  I'll eat and watch a little Netflix before turning in for the night. G'night peoples and we'll talk again soon.



... is never fun regardless of how much or little stuff you happen to own. Ever have that impending sense of doom when you had to do something that you didn't really want to do. I procrastinated this morning and what took place later only served me right for delaying instead of just jumping in. I woke up at 8am this morning and goofed off until around 2pm. When I finally started unpacking I discovered stuff I should've gone through and trashed months ago. That took me about two hours of going thru and eliminating what wasn't needed.  Right when I started moving stuff to the storage shed is when the universe reminded me that it has a devious sense of humor. I had managed to pack one storage container when it started raining. Bridgette heard the thunder clap and we both panicked for different reasons. She ran into the corner and trembled while I went into overdrive trying to move as much stuff to the shed as I could. Luckily, for us both, the rain was light and lasted about 20 minutes. 

Here's what my humble little home looks like at the moment. It was much worse earlier. Bridgette is hiding in her bed behind the TV. Despite how messy things look there I am almost finished emptying out my trailer. The last of the heavy lifting will be done when I get the kitchen stuff out.

This probably isn't the best call but I started drinking about an hour ago. So far I've had only one beer, but I have a feeling that it will grow exponentially as the day progresses. I might be in trouble here.


pics of the new home

Bridgette laying claim to the new bed, before I'd decided to buy.

Plenty of storage

A nice window to let in the morning light.

View from the bed/main entrance

Rear Window. I will not let my leg be broken and/or attempt to solve crimes as a result.

My front door

My actual front of house

I've so missed dual sinks

The new fridge, now with more room!

The new microwave. Hopefully the door won't fall off unexpectedly like it did on my last trailer.

One more burner! Now I'm cooking!

And my head doesn't hit the ceiling in this one.

My knees don't hit the tub, and the door isn't angled.

I have a sink and medicine cabinet again!

And one day, I just know it, my beagle will revenge pee on this glorious bed some day.  She's such a little bitch!

View from the back to front.